AI Psychiatrist

for Degen Crypto Traders
Struggling with the rollercoaster of rug pulls and memecoins? Let our AI shrink soothe your market-induced insomnia and questionable life choices.

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What We Do

Our AI Psychiatrist is specially trained to handle your deepest crypto confessions. From apeful coins to moonshots that crash-landed, we’ve got you covered with comedic reassurance and a sprinkle of not-so-serious advice.

Confessions? Yes Please

Pour out your soul about that time you YOLO’d into another dog-themed coin at 3 AM. We’re all ears, no judgement.

Instant Comic Relief

Our AI will respond with comedic lines, witty comebacks, and a dash of “maybe you should have sold earlier” jokes to keep your spirits high.

24/7 Access

Markets never sleep, and neither do your regrets. That’s why the AI Psychiatrist is always open for your late-night, panic-driven rants.

Testimonials

Real talk from our not-so-real patients:

“I was on the verge of selling my kidney for more leverage. This AI told me to calm down. Sort of saved my kidney, I guess?”
- Chuck M., Degen Trader
“I still HODL my meme coins, but at least I laugh about it now. This shrink is funnier than my old therapist and cheaper than my last short liquidation!”
- Lisa B., Meme Coin Enthusiast
“I tried it for a laugh. Then I realized it’s actually kinda comforting. 10/10 would rant again at 3 AM.”
- Anonymous Whale

Ready for a Session?

Step into our Therapy Room to receive your dose of comedic comfort and AI sarcasm. Don’t wait—your portfolio might be tanking right now, but your sanity doesn’t have to.

Enter Therapy Room